So, I felt the prompting to set my mp3 player to shuffle while doing “chores” today (I usually listen to lectures and teachings,etc.) …and this song started playing: Independence Day. (by Elliott Smith) … It was so profound and so poignant!
I immediately went to find it on YouTube (for you) to post the link here on this blog & I listened to it there and thought to myself:
” ‘this guy’ was tapping into the deep knowledge of the Spirit…” (or of our Creator, or however one describes this phenomenon– i.e., the Psalms of David).
I loved the song when he sang it back when I knew him, and I could feel it was deep, but now, after being a therapist and psychologist for 15+ years, I see much more psychological and Spiritual depth to it–and I was saying to myself “he must’ve just tapped into that, he didn’t consciously ‘know’ all that he was writing.?!” And guess what!? I happened to look down at the comment section on the YouTube vid and “Dressrehersalrags” had commented:
“Elliott didn’t write it. As with John Lennon, this came from the spirit world…”
I have the equivalent of a masters degree in theology and clearly, a deep interest, but I do not know the complexities of what we get to choose before we “show up” here! But I am perfectly serious when I say this — there are no coincidences! I don’t know how it all works, and believe me, that would be a very very long post for you to endure if I began to describe all my thoughts that I’ve gathered and worked through on this subject…so it’ll have to be in small bites and over time (and we each walk our own path and have our own way of understanding Truth, dear God correct me when I am wrong…).
But back to the psychological significance and how it can work to help us change in our every day life:
This subject of
s e p a r a t i n g
from the old ingrained ideas we have received from our sometimes-not-so-conscious parents –is a subject that comes up often in the “therapy room.” We hold on to that which is familiar (“family”). So even when these old ideas are destructive, we repeat them because that is what is known and familiar. They showed us, by their actions, that “THIS is what people do, and it’s impossible to change, or we would have, so don’t even try!”
Like I’ve already written, it’s not like most of our parents meant to teach us these things (even if they did, I’ll eventually do a post on that subject), but forgiveness is still a necessity.
If we just say:
“oh, they didn’t mean to”
then we are excusing them.
And if we keep excusing them, it indicates we are in a “pleasing” /passive position. When we excuse them, we also repeat that same pattern internally and indulge/ EXCUSE ourselves.
Thus, the pattern is repeated! Over and over and over and over….
What is necessary, if we wish to heal, is to consciously move out of the excusing pattern and choose to see that they were responsible then, but now we are adults, we are responsible to separate ourselves from those ideas and patterns. We are responsible to change, heal, bring LOVE to those areas.
I know Elliott would not mind at all if I use his art to help others, because he was so generous in that way— so, we can look at his lyrics to help us–because sometimes art, like the Tolstoy quote indicated, can get us beyond our ingrained defenses, and reveal the truth.
A Future butterfly,
gonna spend the day higher than high
You’ll be beautiful confusion
Ooh, once I was you
It’s important to hold this idea, somewhere in our mind and imagination, that at some future time, God willing, we will be transformed (future butterfly), we will have changed from whatever we are now, here, to what the Creator designed us to become– we will “remember” what it is we are meant to do and BE, because, like Boethius says, everything learned is just remembering.
“Higher than high”, is very clear to me in my perspective now, that – as we ask God to purify our hearts — He can give us an understanding that is higher than our “flesh” or higher than the highest wisdom of this earth. I recall St. Paul describing all of his achievements, knowledge, and religious training he had gained on this earth–that they are all like a dung hill now, in comparison to the knowledge of Christ:
“I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ…”
It’s taken me years, just to understand a little, and have experiences of Grace where I see (understand in my inner self) things that my own mind could have never comprehended by reading books. When we are so caught up in this life, in our depression and pain or in running after things of this earth– or numbing ourselves to “shield” from pain — we get so lost we cannot “see” this place of “higher than high” — but it is like a ray of sunshine that shines through on a day where it was just raining…or I am reminded of Bilbo Baggins, when he is in the thick, dark Mirkwood forest and they (the dwarves) are so discouraged and have almost given up in despair — he climbs the highest tree and sees the sun — and I just remembered, butterflies!
Bilbo says: “There are moments which can change a person for all time” (J. R.R. Tolkien)…
I saw you caught between all the people out making the scene
And a bright ideal, tomorrow
Ooh, don’t go too far
Stay who you are
Imagine that the “you” in these lyrics is another part of “you” –So, part of you is your Soul/spirit and another part of you is caught up in your present-day-personality, your ego-self, the person you see in the mirror– caught in the traps of materiality and temptations of building up your false-self (which doesn’t last).
“Don’t go too far, stay who YOU are”…
Who are You? What if we are all like the prodigal son, we leave the Father and go out “here” on our life’s journey, to experience 3-d time and space, and we are meant to return back to God, in whose likeness and image we were once created? In a way, this return is returning back to who we truly ARE, or were already, in some sense, beyond time. (It’s really difficult to try to summarize or describe this, because it is a deep mystery that is just unfolding to me in my own life, and I do not wish to mislead you in any way–ever, so sometimes it’s better to stay silent!). Tolkien’s Hobbit book was called “a Hobbit’s Journey–there and back again”…Tolkien knew this idea well — much better than I do!
You only live a day
But it’s brilliant anyway
When something is repeated three times in the scriptures in means it is very important, pay attention, there is deeper meaning here! (See C.S. Lewis’ “The Horse and His Boy” — when asked who he is, Aslan replies:
“Myself,” said the Voice, very deep and low so that the earth shook: and again “Myself,” loud and clear and gay: and then the third time “Myself,” whispered so softly you could hardly hear it, and yet it seemed to come from all around you as if the leaves rustled with it…”
You are invited to “know” in a deeper way than you ever thought possible.
Everybody “knows” on one level– such as the surface level, and then on another level, and yet there is a deeper level of knowing beyond that.
I saw you at the perfect place
It’s gonna happen soon, but not today
So go to sleep, and make the change
I’ll meet you here tomorrow
“go to sleep” is not about becoming unconscious or numb, but think of the silk worm or the caterpillar, who willingly lets their outer person “die” or fall away (“sleep”), so that they can change into their true self and fly.
We’ll have to continue this on another blog….
too long already!
“I’ll meet you here tomorrow” (ha!)
Here’s the wonderful book by Boethius, written in 580 AD!